Oh God

[luvxander]

Is it bad when you go to gak a meme called 10 Things That Make Me Happy, and you can't think of anything to write down?

I've come to the conclusion that my level of depression is based solely on how tired I am. It's now a little after 9:30pm and I've been exhaused since around 2:00. My level of depression has gone downhill ever since.

I am so tired of all the voices in my head (not the crazy insane voices, the other ones) telling me how no one really likes me, that I'll always be a humongous blimp and should just give up on losing weight, so many other things from I don't know how to save money to telling me that no one would really notice if I wan't around anymore. I've considered therapy, but a) I can't afford it, b) I wouldn't even begin to know how to go about finding a good therapist. I just want to curl up in a ball and cry myself to sleep and maybe never get up, but I'm forcing myself to pretend to be cheerful and pretend that I even give a crap whether I wake up in the morning.

Comments

[redeem147.livejournal.com]

Well, I like you. I only met you the one time (at Writercon) and liked you enough to friend you on lj (I don't do that with everyone, you know.)