luvxander

You were a handsome, dark, & frightening spy for the capitalist pig nation of America, I was a sexy, elusive Russian spy in stilettos that had a stiletto hidden within. We locked eyes in a cafe in Paris, shared our love of Italian food, and vowed to not let our allegiances affect the relationship between us. Я тоскую без Вас, друга.

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Whoo! It's suddenly warm in here.

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ALRIGHT, REST OF YOUR FLIST. Let's see them bring it. ;)

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I think they're scared...they know they can't top it!

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Oh, I have been challenged!

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We met in 1986 at a Greasy Pole Contest in Meridian, Mississippi. I was the defending 1985 Greasy Pole champion, but it turns out that the title is all sash and no purse, because I didn't have a dime to my name. You bought me a Jiffy Burger with extra pickles and I shared with you the greasy pole secret: roll around in the dirt real good before you climb the pole, and you'll shimmy right up it!

Well, your longer leg hair (and the way you looked in that pencil skirt with the side-slit) really gave you an edge, and you won the prize that day. But we both felt like winners, as we shared a basket of fried peaches, won matching Motley Crue mirrors at the dart booth and took turns making out with the beautiful Choctaw boy who ran the Tilt-a-Whirl. He called us both "Allunsi", but you'll always be CJ to me.

Edited Date: 2011-02-07 02:32 am (UTC)

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Okay. I literally have tears rolling down my cheeks right now.

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In the interest of full disclosure: I "borrowed" the Greasy Pole and Jiffy Burgers from Dolly Parton's autobiography. The beautiful Choctaw boy was also someone I fell in love with for a day at the OK State Fair in 1985. We kissed, we held hands, I rode the Tilt-a-Whirl for free all day and then we went back our respective homes that were 30 minutes apart, which as you will remember, might as well have been galaxies apart when you're 14 and vehicle-less.

I thought this story did us justice, though.

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YOU PULLED THE BIG RAGU DEFENSE!

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Not to mention, she placed hers in Meridian, Mississippi.

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I don't even know what Carmine has to do with this! What? Maybe it's your accent. Say moose and squirrel.

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Carmine Ragusa and Laverne and Shirley had an episode where they had to climb a greased poll!

Now you're gonna tell me that you don't know who BooBoo Kitty is, and my world will crumble.

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I totally know who BooBoo Kitty is! Your world is safe. My favorite is when Shirley was trying to teach Laverne to drive (the brake was a can of beans, I think the gas was a can of soup) and Laverne "ran over" BooBoo Kitty. "The pedestrian always has the right of way!" I don't remember the greasy pole episode, though! *is stumped*

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Is it bad that I don't know who BooBoo Kitty is? I know Laverne and Shirley, but I don't know BooBoo Kitty or Carmine Ragusa.

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saifai.livejournal.com

I believe it was when I met you in the shadowed back corner of a club (that shall remain nameless). You were wearing a sheep costume. There were bananas... and LOTS of witnesses

I promise I haven't shared the photos.

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Those witnesses were all paid well for their silence, thank you very much.

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wirrrn.livejournal.com

You and I met when you and your other puny "Legion of Justice" members tried to take down my Floating Fortress of Buggitude in the Antarctic. I saw you laughing when one of my Winged Monkey troops bit Aquaman in the arse, and I knew that you could be turned to the Dark Side, with a bit of help from my Zombie Mariachi Band, some strawberry lube and Oliver Queen wearing nothing but his bow...

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Mmmm, Oliver Queen!! I do love that OQ and strawberry combo.

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entrenous88.livejournal.com

There was a gorgeous man in a dirty little cafe in Istanbul. His gold teeth glittered in the dull candlelight, and his tight trousers caused half of the patrons to swoon in ecstasy.

From different sides of the room, we both saw him at the same time.

I have no idea which one of us lunged for him first, nor which one of us shrieked, "Hands off beeeyatch!" at the beginning of our fierce encounter as the claws came out (raowr!). But I do know you mashed quiche into my hair and poured wine into my eyes while I bit your leg and hit you repeatedly in the crotch with a baguette.

When we turned, food and drink dripping from us while you nursed a black eye and I screamed like a banshee, he had, for some reason, departed.

How he escaped our savage lust for him, I'll never know. But I know our friendship was born of the desire to hunt him down, like two dingos in search of a delectable baby, and make him choose between us while squirming in the ropes we always, always have ready for him. ♥

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Quick! I think I saw him go around that corner over there!

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inkandchocolate.livejournal.com

A crowded casino. A streak of bad luck. My last chips in my fingertips ready to be dropped on black or red.

Suddenly there you were at my elbow, glittering in red, crisp martini in your hand. You leaned down and whispered in my ear and guided my hand to number 13.

I dropped the chips and held my breath as the wheel spun. You laughed and sipped your drink when I won that small fortune on your say so.

We ravaged the shops of every casino that captured our fancy, ate decadent meals and drank like fish. You lured in the pretty boys and let me watch. I still have the videos locked away in a safe in a small bank on a small island, location never to be disclosed.

We made Vegas our bitch, baby.

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